Same-Sex Marriage Dishonors God and Harms Children

Mar 14

Written By NDCAN

Yesterday, the ND Senate voted down House Concurrent Resolution 3013 which urged the Supreme Court to overturn the landmark decision in Obergefell V. Hodges that ruled same-sex couples have a constitutional right to marry. Like all resolutions, HCR 3013 was non-binding and did not carry the force of law, yet there was significant backlash against the legislators who took a stand for traditional marriage. Some advocates for same-sex marriage claim it is anti-Christian to oppose gay marriage, and others argue that Christians should stop pushing their religion into law, referencing the separation of church and state. However, separation of church and state does not mean that religious beliefs must be kept out of government. In fact, it’s impossible to separate government from God because every law or policy is ultimately rooted in an ideology. We wouldn’t even have the doctrine of separation of church and state if it were not for the Christian worldview. This concept, which is commonly misused in order to shut down Christians in the public square, simply acknowledges the God-ordained establishment of distinct jurisdictions which have different roles and responsibilities. Simply put, the state can’t tell people how to practice their religious beliefs, and the church can’t execute public justice.

While the church and state are two separate spheres of authority, both must operate within the boundaries of God’s Law. Non-Christians balk at this, of course. However, the non-Christians who live in America are unwittingly benefiting from the Christian principles that shaped our nation and created a government that unprecedentedly acknowledged certain unalienable rights. There would be no freedom of expression, equality, or justice without the divine revelation of God given to man within the pages of Scripture. Whether one chooses to believe that or not, it is undeniable that every law is based on a moral claim, and that moral claim has a theological foundation. That foundation is either the inerrant, unchanging Word of God, or it is an amalgam of human-derived religions and subjective standards that is invariably tied to emotional reasoning and tends to fall prey to tyranny. Religious neutrality within politics is a myth. So whether you advocate for gay marriage or oppose it, you are making a claim about what is right and what is wrong and how that should be reflected within law. Both sides are attempting to legislate morality. It’s just a matter of from where that morality derives and which morality will prevail.

The moral argument for gay marriage stems from the prevailing cultural mindset which claims that marriage is simply about the feelings shared between two consenting adults and that sexual desire is foundational to one’s identity and worth as a person. Although the groundwork for rejecting traditional morality was laid down by the philosophies of Nietzsche, Marx, and Darwin by the end of the 19th century, the widespread acceptance of gay marriage is somewhat new. Within a 20 year time span, society moved from the majority of people opposing gay marriage to the near-mandatory celebration of all things LGBTQ, not only within schools, churches, and corporations, but within our laws and policies at all levels of government. This well-coordinated transformation within our society has been ideologically-driven by zealous activists and yet manipulatively framed as basic human kindness that transcends all religious beliefs.

So why did legislators propose this resolution knowing that the culture is largely supportive of same-sex marriage? Is it because they hate people who identify as gay? Is it because they don’t have anything better to do than try to control people’s lives? No. Hopefully, it’s because they recognize that the institution of marriage is much more than the feelings two people have for each other. Marriage was created and defined by God and has been the primary building block of healthy families and societies for millennia. A life-long union between a man and woman is the only marriage relationship that honors God and protects children, and therefore it is the only relationship that government should promote and protect as an institution.

Honoring God

People have the right to support same-sex marriage, but it’s a mistake to claim Christianity while doing so. There is nothing Biblical about gay marriage. It is fundamentally anti-Christ. This alliteration from author, Allie Beth Stuckey, sums up God’s definition of marriage well.

Marriage is:

Rooted in creation (Genesis 1:27)
Reiterated throughout Scripture
Repeated by Jesus (Matthew 19:4-5)
Representative of Christ & the church (Ephesians 5:22-33), & is therefore
Reflective of the gospel

One can attempt to make an argument for why same-sex marriage should be legal, but that argument cannot be rooted in Biblical truth. In the Christian worldview, there is no such thing as a gay person or a straight person. Both are false categories that our modern culture uses to define someone’s core identity. However, sexual attraction doesn’t tell you who you are, it just tells you what you want. According to God’s Word, we are all simply human beings who are born into sin and who therefore have disordered desires that run contrary to a holy God. That’s why we all need a Savior. Ultimately, there are only two identities in God’s eyes: those who are in Christ and those who are not. Those who follow Christ must submit every thought, desire, and behavior to the authority of Christ. Those who reject Christ as Lord live according to their own opinions, emotions, and desires. Most of the time, they will borrow from the Christian worldview when it suits them, and ignore it when it doesn’t.

Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God. You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you. Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live. Romans 8:5-12

There are endless ways to live according to the flesh, but God chooses to be explicitly clear throughout Scripture regarding homosexual desire and behavior. There is no lack of clarity in the Bible when it comes to this issue.

You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination. Leviticus 18:22
If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall surely be put to death; their blood is upon them. Leviticus 20:13
For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. Romans 1:26-28
Now we know that the law is good, if one uses it lawfully, understanding this, that the law is not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers, the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslavers, liars, perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound doctrine, in accordance with the gospel of the glory of the blessed God with which I have been entrusted.
1 Timothy 1:8-11
Just as Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding cities, which likewise indulged in sexual immorality and pursued unnatural desire, serve as an example by undergoing a punishment of eternal fire. Jude 1:7

You can be a Christian or you can be someone who supports gay marriage, but you can’t be both. Those who follow Christ reject the nonsensical mantra that “love is love” and acknowledge that because God himself is love, only He gets to define what that is.

Protecting Children

If honoring God is not reason enough to defend traditional marriage, perhaps the basic adult instinct to protect children could be sufficient reason. Redefining marriage into law has redefined parenthood, and as a result, children’s rights have suffered. No matter how much love is poured out upon a child by their same-sex parents and no matter how many male/female role models actively participate in the child’s life, there is no replacing the child’s innate longing and need for the missing biological mom or dad.

Because we live in an imperfect world, children sometimes lose one or both biological parents. This is a tragedy, and when this happens, responsible adults will attempt to redeem that broken situation by providing loving caregivers for that child. Same-sex couples who rent wombs and buy children (which is essentially human trafficking) are not redeeming a broken situation, they are creating one. They are purposefully bringing a fatherless or motherless child into the world and asking that child to sacrifice on behalf of their adult desires. We must stop doing this.

From Them Before Us using data from the U.S. National Health Interview Survey:

When compared with children in dual-gender households, children in same-sex-headed families:

Were likely to suffer emotional or behavioral difficulties at a rate of 9.3 percent, more than twice the 4.4 percent rate for children in dual-gender families.
Experienced “definite” or “severe” emotional problems at a rate of 14.9 percent versus 5.5 percent.
Were diagnosed with ADHD at a rate of 15.5 percent versus 7.1 percent.
Struggled with learning disabilities at a rate of 14.1 percent versus 8 percent.
Received special education and mental health services at a rate of 17.8 percent versus 10.4 percent.

These are just a few ways children of same-sex parents are disadvantaged. In fact, there are innumerable ways in which children and their rights have suffered as a result of Obergefell, and no one does a better job of explaining how than author and activist, Katy Faust. Read her latest: A Decade of Disaster for Children; Ten years later, Obergefell continues to leave young casualties in its wake.

Although North Dakota’s resolution failed, attempts are being made in other states to challenge the Supreme Court’s decision on gay marriage. Whether or not these attempts are successful, the movement to protect children’s natural rights is growing. Let’s make sure it continues.

-Amber Vibeto, Executive Director
March 14th, 2025